Helpless

There is nothing that raises your awareness of how helpless we are as humans than having a baby.  It is crazy (and exhausting) to have a baby depending on your for EVERYTHING from eating, sleeping, staying warm and going to the bathroom. There was a point where each of us couldn't do any of that on our own.

Brady is in his second stay at Lurie Children's hospital in downtown Chicago, this time for a severe bout of RSV.  He's currently laying on his hospital bed while a team of doctors has tried to insert a catheter line for almost 3 hours.  He's being sedated and immobilized, so right now he's not aware of any of it.  I however, am acutely aware of the breathing tube he has in his nose and mouth, the various lines that are running through his veins, arteries and wherever else they are sticking needles into him.  And last night when Brad stayed up with him, he was definitely aware of his crying from his pain and discomfort.

Just knocked out, catching up on some ZZZ's

Talk about being helpless.  There is absolutely nothing more I can do for my son then be here to support him.  Meanwhile, he's scared, in pain, and sick.  I wish that I could explain to him that it would pass in a few days, but that it sucks for now, but he's 8 months old- it doesn't work that way.  It's hard to feel so dependent on doctors to take care of my son.  Then I remember that Brady belongs to a God who is so much bigger, and who has all the control over this situation!  I can't sit and wring my hands, wondering what I can do.  The most that I can do is pray, and trust that God is working through this situation the same way that he works through our good situations.

I've listened to some songs to help bring a sense of normalcy to this sterile and cold place, and a song by Chris Rice has struck a chord (ahem, ahem)with me.

Sometimes the way is lonely 
And steep and filled with pain 
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then 
Cry to Jesus 
Cry to Jesus 
Cry to Jesus and live! 

In this time, your prayers and love mean more to us than you know.  It is absolutely the most any of us can do!  They sustain us, they give us a sense of peace, they give knowledge and insight to the doctors.

O, and when the love spills over 
And music fills the night 
And when you can't contain your joy inside, then 
Dance for Jesus 
Dance for Jesus 
Dance for Jesus and live! 


Through all of this, we thank God that we live in a city where we have access to excellent healthcare and a wonderful facility.  How wonderful is that?

We'll keep you posted!